A Companion to the Current Sacramental Controversies

From Lyle Lovett's 1992 album Joshua Judges Ruth, a fantastic eucharistic devotional:



Church

I went to church last Sunday

So I could sing and pray,

But something quite unusual

Happened on that day.



Now church it started right on time

Just like it does without a doubt;

And everything was all just fine

Except when it came time to let us out...



You know the preacher he kept preaching,

He told us "I have one more thing to say.

Children before you think of leaving

You better think about the Judgment Day!"



Now everyone got nervous

Because everyone was hungry too,

And everyone was wondering

What was the next thing he would do.



And the preacher he kept preaching

He said "Now, I'll remind you if I may,

You all better pay attention

Or I might decide to preach all day."



And now everyone was getting so hungry.

The old ones started feeling ill,

And the weak ones started passing out,

And the young ones they could not sit still.



And the preacher's voice rose higher,

So I snuck up on the balcony.

I crept into the choir loft,

And I begged them "Brothers, sisters, help me please!"



I said, "When I give you a signal,"

I said, "When I raise up my hand,

Won't you please join with me together?

Praise the Lord I have a plan!"



And the preacher he kept preaching,

"Long is the struggle, hard the fight!"

And I prayed, "Father please forgive me,"

And then I stood up and with all my might

I sang:



"To the Lord let praises be,

It's time for dinner now let's go eat!

We've got some beans and some good cornbread,

Now listen to what the preacher said.

Now it's to the Lord let praises be

It's time for dinner now let's go eat!"



Yes and I did give a signal,

Yes and I raised up my hands,

And then joined with me the choir,

Yes every woman, child, and man.

They sang

"To the Lord let praised be

It's time for dinner now let's go eat

We've got some beans and some good cornbread,

Now listen to what the preacher said."



And the preacher he stopped preaching,

And a hush the church did fill.

And then a great white dove from up above

Landed on the window sill.



And the dove flew down beside him,

And a fork appeared right in his hand,

And with everybody watching

The preacher ate that bird right there and then.



And now everyone got really nervous,

And the preacher he did start to glow.

And as we watched in disbelief

These were the words he spoke:



He said, "Now Mama's in the kitchen,

And she's been there all day.

And I know she's cooking something good,

So let's bow our heads and pray."



And he sang,

"To the Lord let praises be

It's time for dinner now let's go eat

We've got some beans and some good cornbread

Now listen to what the preacher said."



And the moral of this story,

Children it is plain but true.

God knows if a preacher preaches long enough

Even he'll get hungry too.



And he'll sing,

"To the Lord let praises be,

It's time for dinner now let's go eat.

We've got some beans and some good cornbread,

Now listen to what the preacher said.

He said to the Lord let praised be,

It's time for dinner now let's go eat!"



Word and sacrament: vital to the health of the Christian and the Church. In the same album Lovett also reveals some of his thoughts on purgatory:



Now there was two little imps and they was black as tar,

And they was trying to get to heaven in a 'lectric car.

That car wheel slipped on down the hill,

Instead of going to heaven they went to Jacksonville.

-Since the Last Time, Lyle Lovett



Ah, good old north Florida!